Becky Hulst

I moved to Portland in 2008 and found myself in a new city, freshly divorced, struggling to figure out who I was and how to rebuild my community. On that journey I found my dear friend Annie Mancini, and that friendship has changed my life. Through Annie I met Julie and Dennis, Joe, and Roro. And suddenly (almost bewilderingly) I was embraced by the entire Mancini / Bromka entourage; Friendsgivings, family parties - nothing was too precious that it couldn't welcome more.

One visit, after a raucous night of birthday celebration, glitter and ice cream, I asked Julie what the secret was to her 30 year marriage. The distilled (PG) version of her response: "I didn't have one 30 year marriage. I've had three 10 year marriages." She described how her marriage went through phases; each with their own highs and lows, stories of loving and fighting. Through that conversation Julie taught me to see through the myths of success and perfection. That great things didn't have to be achieved through *Greatness*, but rather embracing what's real - even if it's shitty - and working to make what we can, better.

Julie helped me let go of the weight of my divorce then, but her perspective continues to positively impact my life today. To seek out and celebrate realness: the kind that welcomes you for who you *actually* are, not for who you're *supposed* to be. It's that kind of acceptance that helps a person realize their true full potential throughout life, and it's one of the greatest gifts I've ever been given. Thanks Julie.